Parenting is the single most difficult and important job in the world. It’s non-stop, stressful, unrelenting, high-pressure, intense work that draws out a gamut of emotions. So, naturally, I couldn’t WAIT to become a mom!
Three kids in, and I’m not just a regular mom…I’m a cool mom (I only polled myself, but I consider that a reliable poll nonetheless). While being insanely cool is a noteworthy venture, I aspire to be not just a cool mom, but a great mom! As it turns out, good parenting requires effort when I’m weary, strength when I’m tired, confidence when I’m guilt-ridden, and careful thought and planning. Admitting I don’t have all the answers and that Yes, I do in fact need help, has become the rule, not the exception. *Sigh.
Today’s culture presents some unique challenges. If we’re not careful, culture will take over and raise our kids for us. If that doesn’t terrify you, you’re not paying attention.
For parents, the minutes turn to days, the days to months, and the months to years so quickly that we often fail to realize that our culture is playing a bigger role in raising our kids than we are. We have to constantly prune the garden that is our children’s lives and not let weeds run rampant. Today I bring you Part One of a three-part series entitled Culture-Raised Kids. Part One includes the elements of culture that are family life and spirituality.
Family Life
The impact a strong family life has on kids is perhaps the most underrated element in society today. The pursuit of the elusive “happiness” trumps keeping families together time and time again. Our culture has fallen hook, line, and sinker for the lie that the grass is greener on the other side. Many spouses are unwilling to fight for their marriage, duped into believing it should be easy to love another imperfect human day in and day out. (Spoiler alert: It’s not. But it IS doable.)
Each parent has an invaluable role in raising kids. Downgrading that to a part-time job is detrimental. Don’t fall in line with culture in teaching your kids that strong family involvement is totally optional. It’s absolutely essential to the strong development of our boys and girls and ultimately the strength of society itself. Our children learn who they are, where they come from, and who they will be by watching and listening to how we, their parents, live our lives.
Each family will look different based on experiences, unique challenges, and individuals’ choices that are sometimes beyond our control. People make mistakes (darn humans). Sometimes you’ve got to make wrong decisions right or clean up other people’s messes. Life isn’t made of rainbows and fairy dust. Good intentions fall short. Life is hard. We fail. Often. There’s no cookie-cutter image to live up to.
God hands out forgiveness and redemption like candy at a parade. He ain’t even mad at ya. He creates beauty from ashes and erects a masterpiece constructed of our very broken pieces. It’s never too late, no one is ever too far gone. Intentionally create a strong family unit with the loved ones you do have. God will take your little bit and turn it into a lot.
Take Action!
Spend time with your kids. Create memories. Surprise them. Have weekly, monthly, and annual traditions that they’ll always remember and pass down to their kids one day. Talk to them. Watch them play. Read to them, even when they’re big. Set high expectations. Believe in them. Hold them accountable. Make them do their share. Give them responsibilities. Take them to church. Lead by example. Play games with them. Tell them you’re sorry. Tell them you love them. Give them a hug and a kiss every single day. Tell them yes. Tell them no. Don’t protect them from natural consequences. Teach them that family is the most important thing after God, and live that out yourself.
Spirituality
No matter one’s religion, beliefs, or unbelief, spirituality is something that every human will grapple with in their lifetime. We were created to long for something more, something bigger than ourselves. Every person has a God-sized hole that can only be filled with Him.
Today’s culture is so focused on being inclusive, on making everyone feel accepted, happy, and hunky dory, we tread ever-so-lightly around this topic. The truth is, our country was founded on Biblical principles. Our laws, norms, and traditions are centered around Judeo-Christian beliefs. Society today denies these truths, blurs moral lines and ignores right and wrong. What once was taken for granted is now cause for confusion and protest.
Take Action!
Teach your kids the facts. Buy them their own Bible. Read the Bible to them. Do family devotions regularly. Be a spiritual leader. Talk about God and the things He’s created. Teach them His words and His promises. Tell them He gave His life for them and He loves them unconditionally. Live like you believe it. Let them know that there IS right and wrong. Teach them about forgiveness. Tell them they should always stand up for what they believe. Prepare them to defend their faith. Teach them not to be judgmental – it’s not in their job description. Show them that how they live speaks louder than what they say. Make sure they know that it’s not about what people look like, where they live, or how they worship, it’s about what they believe in their hearts. Teach them to, above all else, LOVE others. Teach them what it means to be like Jesus.
Love it & wonderful reminders!
Thank you, Katy!