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5 Ways to Stay YouTube Safe

I would have DIED of sheer star power if YouTube had existed when I was a kid. I would have blown. it. up. with videos of yours truly singing, dancing, acting…it’s really a shame the public didn’t have the chance to see what a gem I was. The world wasn’t ready. (Bahahahaha! Thank you Lord Jesus it didn’t happen. You really are looking out for me.)

On a serious note, YouTube is awesome. Whether we want to laugh, learn, reminisce, or DIY, it’s all right there! I seriously can’t imagine going back to a world in which we needed archaic instruction manuals to know things. I mean, ain’t nobody got time for that. I’d much rather search YouTube for an immediate demonstration on how to repair a car/fix the dishwasher/get a baby to sleep/remove giblets from a chicken/perfect a messy bun/slice a mango. YouTube’s got us covered, guys.

Also, people are making actual fortunes by loading videos on YouTube. My kids even have their own channel! Just to be clear, they’re not making fortunes (bums), but they’re having fun. I think these will be precious memories to look back on when they’re older.

Hands down, the biggest use of YouTube in our home is for watching sports. My boys watch the highlights of just about every NFL and NBA game. They watch highlight reels of their favorite athletes and try to emulate the plays. They often throw it back to the good ol’ days and watch legendary athletes they couldn’t otherwise see today.

Just as with everything else this day in age, YouTube is inevitably corrupted by bad apples. Inappropriate content, misleading click bait, and detrimental influences are all readily available via the medium of YouTube. Some parents avoid it altogether and some stick their heads in the sand and choose not to deal with it at all. I believe there’s a happy medium. There is a way to keep your kids safe on YouTube while allowing them to view positive or valuable content.

1. Determine safe, appropriate YouTube accounts your kids are allowed to watch. As we started letting the kids dabble on YouTube a few years ago, I googled safe, kid-friendly YouTube channels and made a list of those we could trust. The kids knew they were ONLY allowed to watch those specific channels. A few of our current favorites are (non-sports related): EvanTube, Super Hero Kids, Dude Perfect, Ryan’s Toy Review, and Toy Lab TV, and of course their own channel, Sports Sons! These channels post only trustworthy content to keep kids safe on YouTube.

2. Set ground rules and clear expectations. This is the. most. important. thing. Let your kids know that watching YouTube is a privilege and you won’t hesitate to shut it down if it’s used incorrectly. Tell them there’s content on YouTube that is inappropriate that they’ll always have to watch out for, but they’ll be mainly safe if they stay within the set boundaries. (You don’t have to go into detail about what “bad stuff” is out there…just tell them that some people put stuff on YouTube (and all over the internet) that no one, especially kids, should see.) Let them know you’ll be watching, listening, and monitoring what they’re watching. Tell them about the safety app you have installed. Bringing the potential issues to them BEFORE they experience them and helping them understand the risks AHEAD of time keeps the monsters out of the dark, so to speak. This way you’ll all be on the same page.

3. Kids watch YouTube in the family room. This is essential! My kids predominantly watch YouTube (and everything else) in our family room. I’m in and out of the room but usually within earshot. We rarely have had anything come up on YouTube that’s not appropriate, but if I’ve heard someone utter a questionable word, I’ll poke my head in and say, “Hey, bud. What are we watching?” This holds the kids accountable for using caution in what they watch, and it keeps us parents informed.

In full disclosure, my kids do have a TV in their room with no channel access. We put it there for the purpose of them playing Xbox. We do have it set up for them to watch YouTube, Netflix, and Hulu. They only utilize that privilege on Friday and Saturday nights when we let them watch a movie or show at bedtime. Thanks to the other safeguards and expectations we have always had in place, we have never had an issue with this (knock on wood)!

4. Turn on Restricted Mode. Under the Settings tab on your YouTube account (scroll to the very bottom of the page), there is the option to turn on “Restricted Mode.” It takes two seconds. This only removes content that has been flagged inappropriate. So, if a video has been posted that is inappropriate but has not yet been flagged, it will still show up. Note: my husband is a gun guy (builds them, paints them, shoots them, and competes with them) and YouTube doesn’t seem to be a Second Amendment fan. Even gun videos that are clean and appropriate won’t come up with this filter on.

5. Install a safety app on devices. These are a MUST when your kids receive their own devices. Not because they’re going to seek out anything bad, but because the bad stuff falls in their laps. A quick Google search will reveal many different options. A handful with great reviews are: Net Nanny, Secure Teen, Teen Safe, and MM Guardian. We use MM Guardian for my 12-year-old’s phone right now.

A few things to keep in mind regarding this app for us:

  1. This is the first safety app we’ve tried (it was recommended to us),
  2. My son doesn’t have cell service on his phone as of yet – he just uses it for apps, browsing, and i-messaging, and
  3. It works really well thus far!

I’ll soon write an entire blog post on the functions and benefits of this particular app and introduce the features of the others.

And finally, my disclaimer: These are the guidelines that have worked for our family. They’re certainly not foolproof nor will they work for every family. This is not an end all be all or a substitute for actual parental supervision (darn it!). These are, however, suggestions you can implement to protect your children if you allow them to watch YouTube. Do you allow your kids to watch YouTube? What precautions do you take to keep them safe?

Simple Spring Break Ideas

Anyone else have a serious case of spring fever? I’m dying over here. It’s funny, but I used to love the cold weather. As I’ve gotten older I am less and less tolerant of any temperature that is below 60 and over 80. Anyone up for a move to Hawaii?

Alright, FINE. If I can’t live on a tropical island somewhere, I’ll just soak up the sweet days of spring here in North Texas before too cold becomes too hot. For now, dreams of self-tanner, cut-off shorts, sundresses, spring-colored nails, and quality family time with some fresh new inexpensive and free spring break ideas are swirling in my head.

First of all, we’re not spring break travelers. My kids are such homebodies, although I’m sure they’d have fun on a spring break getaway, they’d feel cheated that they didn’t get time to be at home on their week off. I guarantee it. When I was a teacher, the LAST THING ON EARTH I wanted to do was pack up and go somewhere during my week off. Even now that I work from home, I prefer traveling in the summer when we have plenty of time to prepare and ample time to recover. My goal for spring break is simply this: to be intentional with our time together and hope it’s memorable for us all.

But, if I don’t think of spring break ideas ahead of time, that week will fly by almost without notice. I’ve gathered some of our favorite, free, simple, and inexpensive things to do as a family (nothing crazy, just low-key yet meaningful, fun, and intentional) and put them on our 2019 Spring Break Bucket List. We won’t get to all of them, but we’ll get to some, and that will be just perfect. Here are my spring break ideas:

Read a novel together. One of my favorite things I do with my older boys on a regular basis is reading together at night. Our consistency in doing this ebbs and flows depending on what season we’re in (too often practices and homework dominate our evenings). Some of our favorite reads so far are The Adventures of Winnie The Pooh, Wonder, Harry Potter (we’re on book 3 now), and The One and Only Ivan. We seriously look forward to this time so much. It’s a great way to connect with my kids and spend time with just my big boys (I put the little one to bed first). Over spring break, I’m hoping we’ll finish the third Harry Potter book, The Prisoner of Azkaban.

Start (or in our case, continue) a family devotional. If you haven’t read my post on our favorite family devotionals, head over here for some great suggestions! I also saw that Tony Evans recently came out with a family devotional in his Kingdom series, called Kingdom Family. It’s less than $8 on Amazon. Do you know and love Tony Evans? I find such incredible wisdom in his words and in his work. I will definitely be checking this devotional out.

A trip to the zoo. We have a small zoo about 15 minutes away, and we sometimes make the trek to the Dallas or Ft. Worth zoos or even the drive-through zoo. This is fun for all ages, educational, and it will certainly help you get your steps in.

Look at the stars. I always vow to do this with my kids and never do. I’m going to try to make that happen over spring break. I’m thinking blankets in the bed of the truck, snacks, and cuddles.

Go for a walk or bike ride. Taking walks on a sunny day puts me in a great mood every time! There’s just something about that mix of vitamin D and endorphins. My boys love riding their bikes, but I don’t have one. I’ve been thinking about getting one, but I’d have to get a toddler seat to mount, as well. What do you think? Should I get one? I need input!

Let the kids take turns choosing and cooking dinner. Okay, so I’ll probably only do this once per kid, but it will be fun one-on-one time and a learning experience for them, as well.

Have a front yard family baseball game. Play catch, hit some balls, even set out some makeshift bases for a real live showdown. Girls vs. boys? Adults vs. kids? Make it interesting! My husband doesn’t let the kids win. He makes them earn it. (And they usually do!)

A trip to an amusement park. My parents got us season tickets to Six Flags, so this is always a fun option. Again, this is winning entertainment for every age! My three-year-old can’t stop talking about how much fun he recently had at “Flick Flags.”

A family picnic at the park. Give us a nice day at the park and a bag of five sandwiches, chips, fruit, cookies, and some drinks, and my kids will have a blast and never want to leave. This is free fun at its finest! Bonus: they’re really tired at bedtime!

Complete a random act of kindness. Or two or three! Pay for someone in the drive-through line, leave a quarter in the basket at Aldi, take blankets, socks, shoes, or gift cards to the homeless, volunteer at the local food bank, or leave a surprise on a neighbor’s doorstep. This will be a fun activity to complete together as a family

Spend individual time with each kid. If you can, carve out a morning or afternoon to spend one-on-one time with each kiddo. If you have two kids and a partner, split them between you. If you have more than 2 kids, get creative! You’ll never regret spending time with them, and you’ll both have fantastic memories of Spring Break 2019!

Happy Spring Breaking, friends!

Countdown to Discipline: How to Get Kids to Listen | The Simple Step You Can Implement Right This Minute To Light a Fire Under Your Kids

Do you ever get so freaking tired of asking your kids to do things over and over and over again? I don’t, I’m just asking for a friend. Pssssh. Seriously, though. Sometimes it feels like banging my head up against a wall. As it turns out, I don’t enjoy banging my head up against walls. So I avoid such banging and likewise end up avoiding asking my kids to do things I really need them to do because, quite frankly, it robs me of joy and the will to live. Have you, like me, ever just wanted to know how to get kids to listen?

Can you relate to the following scenario?

It’s been an insane day of meetings, housework, screaming babies, traffic, and/or [you fill in the blank]. You will yourself to figure out something for dinner so your people can be fed without you having to make a trip to the store. The kids get home from school and chaos ensues. They need help with homework, studying, and redoing failed assignments.

You succeed in throwing together a last-minute, healthy-ish dinner (you champion, you) just for the kids to eat three bites of just the mac n’ cheese and then announce they’re so very full, but can they please have some cereal? It’s 6:07 pm, which means you can reasonably send them to showers and baths and start the journey toward bedtime in approximately 53 minutes, but who’s counting?

It’s time for those helpful little darlings to do their after dinner chores and, as per usual, their distractions are next-level. You remind them nicely, ask them again, and again, and again before you raise your voice and start shelling out consequences. They then look at you like you’ve lost your actual mind. “Why are you being so mean, mom? Why are you so mad? We’re just playing with our brothers, mom. GOSH. It’s like you don’t even want us to play with each other.” (Your eye starts twitching.)

Exasperated, you settle for whatever they manage to accomplish, which is picking up about 50% of the toys, clothes, and shoes off the floor, wiping about 30% of the crumbs off the table, and sweeping around (but not under) the table. You really need help, but it’s just too exhausting to fight them. Knowing how to get kids to listen and act would pretty much make your life, right?

You guys, the struggle is real. I feel like I have us set up for success by establishing routines and minimal nightly chores, but, with this brood of wild boys in my lair, our reality doesn’t always pan out so perfectly. It’s not that they’re not trying to do the right thing. They’re not deliberately ignoring me, they just find it incredibly difficult to focus (I have no idea where they get that. Ahem.). It’s more that, until now, I didn’t know how to get kids to listen, focus, and move with a purpose.

Lean in closely, friends. I’ve found a way that lights a fire under rears of children of all ages. I give them 1) a specific time limit and 2) a consequence that will follow if the task isn’t completed within the given time frame. Boom. Hand to the heavens, it works almost every time. “Hey bud, if the floor isn’t swept PERFECTLY (this means “good enough” in adolescent talk) by 6:10, you’ll get an X on your chart.” (If you haven’t read my post on the simplest and most effective discipline system I’ve ever used, find it here.) Or “Kiddo, if you haven’t put your clothes away where they belong (I said you have to be specific) by 5:47, you’re going to get a pop on the bottom.” (I have a wooden spoon, and I’m not afraid to use it.)

Kids really appreciate knowing what to expect and having clear expectations. A time limit gives them the ability and the will to focus. Heck, I wish someone would do this to me all day. I’m going to try it on myself.

So, set a reasonable time expectation and be clear about what you expect to be done. Tell them the consequence that will follow if the task isn’t complete by that certain time. Make sure it’s something you’re fully ready and willing to enforce (like an “X”). In the event your kids miss the mark, enforce the consequence with no exceptions. Then give them another chance to get it right. “This time, you have until 6:02. Good luck!” This can all be done respectfully with no emotion and no raised voices. Don’t remind the kids after you’ve set the expectation. You don’t want to get yourself into the habit of nagging on top of setting time limits! (There goes your joy again.) It may take them a time or two, but after they see you mean business, they won’t test it again.

Happy timing!

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