Get Out of the Comparison Trap and Just Be Yourself!
We all know someone who appears to have it all figured out. We watch them from ImSoInadequateville and wish for more. Wish that we could decorate like she can, mom like she can, wife like she does, own that business like she does, multitask like she can, cook like she does, manage that company like she does, dress like she does…(YOU fill in the blank). The list of people I think I should “be like” just might be never-ending. The comparison trap is a real thing!
The truth is, God has generously gifted each of us in special ways. He had no intention of us living up to one another; He simply wants us to live up to exactly who He created us to be. Nothing more, nothing less. Have you ever reached a status IN ANY AREA OF LIFE in which you can declare that you have now officially “arrived?” Um, I haven’t. And I’m willing to bet that whoever you have in mind that you think you should be living up to hasn’t either. In one of her must-read books, Unglued, Lysa TerKeurst speaks about “imperfect progress.” Oh, how this resonated so deeply with me. I MUST be content with making progress, a little at a time, imperfectly, without comparison to others, and NOT in my own strength, but with the help of my Savior. It has to be enough. It IS enough. Claim freedom now from the comparison trap!
I constantly scour Pinterest in search of the next TO DIE FOR (and healthy, of course) meal I could impress my family with, the latest DIY that would make my home a little prettier, outfit ideas to make sure I’m right on trend…and all the while I just might have people who already actually look up to me, who are happy with how I’m taking care of my family (hoping my husband and kids are on this short list), love our home (hope they’re on this one, too), and who even love my outfits!
Do YOUR best. At the end of the day, get into bed tired. I mean DEAD-TIRED, from doing the best at whatever it is you do. And be proud. Be proud of your imperfect, unarrived self. Your less-than-perfect kids, your best-I-could-do-parenting, your Martha-Stewart-Shmartha-Stewart homemaking, your I’m-So-Not-Pioneer-Woman dinner, and ask Jesus to stand with you as you try to do a little better tomorrow.
I’ve heard that the wise Eleanor Roosevelt once said that “You wouldn’t worry so much about what others think of you if you realized how seldom they do.” What excellent advice! I have often come back to this quote when I’m feeling particularly stuck in that familiar comparison trap, especially inadequate, or self-conscious. It is far too true that no one else is looking down on you like you are yourself. Maybe, what with all her wisdom, accomplishments, and accolades, Mrs. Roosevelt HAD arrived. But I bet she didn’t think so. 🙂